I have known for some time now that I wanted to go back to school--pretty much have known that since I graduated with my BA--what can I say, I love school :) What I haven't known for some time is what I wanted to go back to school for--that has been a journey, but one that I wouldn't trade for anything else in the world.
My previous blog hit on what the journey has looked like for me to figure out who I am. It hasn't always been an easy road--in fact, there were moments and even seasons when I just wanted to kick it all to the curb and stay a jumbled mess, but thankfully, I hung in there. What I have learned along the way is how much I love helping people, and while I love helping people in just about any way I can, I especially love helping people find freedom in Christ. Freedom is one of my alltime favorite words.
I was struck yesterday in conversation with friends by how much has changed in my life--and I'm not talking small, expected life changes--I'm talking huge never-in-a-million-years-thought-it-could-change changes. The lies I used to buy not only about myself but about others as well are no longer an option, whereas there was once a day when I would accept them without even a second thought. Lies were my reality. Bondage was my reality.
I wouldn't be who I am today and I wouldn't have the hope that I have to offer others if I hadn't walked through it, and for that I am thankful. It is in this victory that I have arrived at the decision to return to school for an MA in Counseling Psychology and to pursue a Marriage and Family Therapy License. I have no idea where I am headed from this point forward and I have no idea how this degree will shape my path. I simply know that I desire nothing more than to see people be freed in the same ways that I have been freed--and for others to know that their present reality does not have to be their future reality.
Even in being certain that this is what I want to pursue, I have still toggled in my mind with whether it is the right school, and whether it is the right time, and whether it is the right degree--and then the director of the program said this at my intake interview: Being a Marriage and Family Therapist is about improving relationships--and all I can say is that it all seemed right. I can think of nothing more wonderful on this earth than helping people improve their relationships, whether with others or with themselves. I can also think of nothing more beautiful than being in a profession that is not overtly Christian and still being entirely about what Jesus is about. God desires for our relationships to be good, to be healthy and for us to be free from the damage of poor relationships.
I start school the first week of July and the program will take 18-months to complete. My life is going to look very different during that time, but the sacrifice is well worth it. I have no idea yet how I am going to change through the process, I only know that I will, and I can't wait. As with the rest of my life, every step of the journey is worth it--and simply being able to walk it all with the Lord is a privilege that I can't hardly even begin to put words to. It is for Him, with Him and because of Him that I take this next step into the unknown.
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